♪ she took me over into her cabaret well she took me over into her cabaret ♪ ♪ well we ate 'em and we drank 'em till the break of day ♪ ♪ one thing i like about that gal of mine one thing i like about that gal of mine ♪ ♪ one thing i like about that gal of mine she treats me right and loves me all the time ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jay: lyle lovett! good job, lyle. thank you very much. yeah, a very nice job, sir. yeah, thank you. >> thank you. >> jay: i want to thank my guests, sarah silverman, paula deen and lyle lovett. monday night, simon cowell and britney spears will be here.

but jimmy fallon coming up next. jimmy! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: from studio 6b in rockefeller center, the national broadcasting company presents -- tonight's guests are -- and featuring the legendary roots crew. and here he is -- jimmy fallon! [ cheers and applause ] captions paid for by nbc-universal television -- captions by vitac -- www.vitac.com ♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: hey, thank you so

much. welcome. [ cheers and applause ] welcome you guys. thank you and welcome to "late night with jimmy fallon," everyone. we've got a big show. it's going to be a lot of fun tonight. here's what people are talking about today. weather forecasters are now referring to hurricane sandy next week as franken-storm -- [ laughter ] because it will fall on halloween. of course, they don't have any more info on the storm because they spent the last four days coming up with franken-storm. [ laughter ] what cool name could we come up -- hurricane boo boo? no, no, no. have you guys seen this? during a rally last night in ohio, mitt romney sang "america the beautiful" with meatloaf. have you seen this? [ light laughter ] we have a clip. i'm not even kidding. watch this. ♪ god shed his grace on thee ♪ ♪ oh and crown thy good

oh from sea oh from sea to shining sea ♪ [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: what? why? >> jimmy: if i was running, i would do anything for votes, but i wouldn't do that. [ laughter ] did you see mitt? i feel bad for mitt because, like -- [ as mitt romney ] okay, buddy, calm down. >> steve: i gotta go. >> jimmy: all right, everybody. it's almost -- all right, calm down. what's he doing? i got to watch it again. just do it one more time. >> steve: i think he's having a heart attack. ♪ god shed his grace on thee ♪ ♪ oh and crown thy good oh from sea oh from sea to shining sea, yeah ♪

[ laughter and applause ] [ as mitt romney ] >> jimmy: all right, all right, buddy. all right, very good. wrap up the song. okay, all right. >> steve: woo, my gosh. >> jay: that's unbelievably awesome. some more campaign news. you didn't see that? dude, that's real. yeah, yeah, yeah. >> steve: that's not doctored. >> jimmy: it's real, yeah. so, more campaign news -- mitt romney's campaign co-chair john sununu is facing criticism after he said that colin powell only endorsed barack obama because he's black. [ audience oohs ] or as democrats put it, "oh-nunu, you didn't." [ laughter ] john sununu. [ scattered applause ] we have james van der beek on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] he'll be out here. i'm glad we have him on the show. i mean, i don't want for our lives to be over. [ laughter ] i want to know right now, what will it be. >> steve: that's all. >> jimmy: this is not good, you guys. "the new york times" just revealed that its profits fell by 85% in the last three months.

"the times" really -- they're really cutting back. take a look at their crossword puzzle. this is just -- awful. [ laughter ] it gets even worse. look at saturday's puzzle. i mean, i could get that. [ laughter ] it's supposed to be more difficult. >> steve: that's not good. >> jimmy: you could pick a wrong letter. you know, that's true. >> steve: you have to wait a week, though. >> jimmy: and finally, there are a lot of rumors circulating that kim kardashian and kanye west are about to get engaged. [ audience ohs ] you can tell they're getting serious. last week they were seen at a jewelry store shopping for publicity. [ light laughter ] we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots, everybody! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: we have a big show tonight. we love it when this guy stops by. he's got a scary new movie and a new play. ethan hawke is here tonight!

[ cheers and applause ] the one and only. one of my favorite actors out there. plus, from "don't trust the b in apartment 23," james van der6beek is dropping in. [ cheers and applause ] plus, he's an nba all-star, olympic gold medalist and starting point guard for the brooklyn nets. deron williams is stopping by! [ cheers and applause ] brooklyn! >> steve: brooklyn in the house! >> jimmy: and we have music from the xx. it's going to be good stuff tonight! [ cheers and applause ] friday night, lot of fun. psyched. you guys know i've really been into instagram lately. you guys into this? are you familiar with instagram? [ scattered cheers and applause ] it's an app on your phone that lets you take a picture and post it so all your friends and followers can see it. it's really fun. so get this, next week we're going to take the best diy halloween costume pics that

you've posted on instagram, and we're going to show them on our show. to help get things going, i've posted a photo of me on instagram in my halloween costume, which i made myself, and gave it a #diyhalloweencostume. take a look at my costume. that's it there. [ laughter ] this is fit romney. that's what i call that. [ laughter and applause ] get it, fit? you just use -- >> steve: yeah, 'cause he's fit. >> jimmy: we've already gotten tons of great costumes, like thousands, already. but, there's super simple ones like this one. this guy is called the foiler. [ laughter ] >> steve: the foiler. >> jimmy: the foiler. yeah, he wrapped himself up in aluminum foil. calls himself the foiler. i think it's rad. >> steve: fantastic. >> jimmy: then there's some really elaborate involving their children, too. look how cute this one is. a mouse -- [ audience aws ] a mouse trap. it's a little wagon and the baby is sitting in there. like a trapped dead mouse. yeah, but a really cute one. so here you go, you guys. still get some more pics.

so when you guys are out at your halloween parties this weekend all dressed up in your crazy outfits, take loads of pics. put them on instagram and add the #diyhalloweencostume, so we can find it. then we'll take the best costumes and show them next week for halloween. it's going to be fun. you guys -- [ cheers and applause ] thank you. [ imitating meatloaf ] ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: all right, you're done. [ as mitt romney ] >> jimmy: all right, buddy, we're done. we're out of here. can we get the car going? >> steve: you're not done yet. [ as mitt romney ] >> jimmy: you're the best. okay, buddy. get me out of here. >> steve: i'm not here. >> jimmy: i love all these -- get security. okay -- pleasure to see you. [ light laughter ] can we show just a quick clip of that one more time?

>> steve: real quick. ♪ god shed his grace on thee ♪ poor john rich -- >> steve: i know. he's going, "okay." >> jimmy: all righty. >> steve: ha-ha. ha-ha. >> jimmy: one of us was singing a different song. [ laughter ] love that dude, john rich, man. today is friday, and that's usually when i catch up with some personal stuff. i check my inbox, return some e-mails and, of course, send out "thank you notes." i have to do that. [ cheers and applause ] it's just the polite thing you do. i started since i was a young boy. now, as a man, i still do it. well, i'm running a bit behind. so i thought, if you guys wouldn't mind, because the hurricane's coming, i just want to get it all out. >> steve: get it all out now. >> jimmy: franken-storm is going -- stick myself in my apartment and just not leave and just live off spaghetti os for a week. >> steve: exactly. you have -- 30 cases of spaghetti os. >> jimmy: i got 30 cases of spaghetti os. yeah, 'cause i don't even have any water or nothing no can opener either. just slam it like -- with a rock.

and, so anyways, i'd like to just do them -- i'd like to send out my weekly thank you notes right now. if i write them out, do you mind? can i do that? [ cheers and applause ] you guys are the best. jamesy-bones, how you doing, buddy? can i get some thank you note writing music, please? ♪ [ laughter ] man, went into a trance. yeah. >> steve: he becomes one with the music. >> jimmy: he plays with his mind. >> steve: yeah. no hands. >> jimmy: yup. >> steve: aww. >> jimmy: oh! i didn't hear anything played, though. ♪ oh, there you go. wait, lift up the other hand. ♪ all right. good one, you got me. all right. ♪ thank you, people who give out apples at halloween, for basically saying, "hey, kids, can you throw these apples out for us?" [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: apples? >> jimmy: give me some candy, man. ♪

thank you, hamburger helper glove, for helping me cook and for never mentioning how you lost a finger. [ laughter ] [ applause ] don't ask. don't ask. >> steve: don't even ask. >> jimmy: oh, this is delicious. what -- did you put something different in here? there's a ring! [ laughter ] i think i'll have seconds, honey. >> steve: oh, my gosh. is that a hot dog? [ country accents ] >> jimmy: this is delicious. what is this, june? you like this, too? >> steve: i love hamburger helper. >> jimmy: wait a second. i think this is a fingernail. no, no, that ain't true. wait, a second, this is -- oh, it's a ring. >> steve: oh, my gosh. >> jimmy: there you go, man. [ scattered groans ] >> steve: ew. >> jimmy: gross, man. >> steve: come on. >> jimmy: ew! >> steve: ew. >> jimmy: that is so gross. how dare you make fun of hamburger helper. no one finds a finger in their hamburger helper. [ light laughter ] ♪ thank you, pumpkin carving, or

as serial killers call it, practice. there you go. [ laughter ] [ eerie music ] { county accent ] you want some hamburger helper? just made it. [ laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, clearance sales, for turning the sentence "who would buy this crap?" into "i only paid 20 bucks for this crap." [ laughter and applause ] i don't need that. it's only 20 bucks. >> steve: oh, well, get it then. >> jimmy: pretty decent, man. >> steve: this will sit in my closet. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, drink shakers, for being maracas for alcoholics. [ laughter ] [ cheers ] ♪ [ tropical music ] ♪ from sea to shining yeah, yeaaah! ♪

[ as mitt romney ] all right, all right, man. all right. two out of three ain't bad. >> steve: "bat out of hell" -- >> jimmy: -- zero to three for that one. okay, all right. security, get the limousine. all right. thank you very much for doing this. [ light laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, people who give out raisins on halloween, for basically saying, "my front door is missing some eggs and toilet paper." there you go, guys. those are my "thank you notes." we'll be back with "battle of the instant dance crews." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ go! go olive garden.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: welcome back, everybody. thank you for watching our show. break out your dancing shoes, everybody, because we're about to do some sweet, sweet moves to some sweet dance grooves. it's time for "battle of the instant dance crews." here we go. ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: before the show, we picked ten people from our audience that never met before, but they all have one thing in common. they love to dance. [ light laughter ]

then we split them into two dance crews. and here's how talented our audience is here at "late night." these guys have had just 45 minutes to make up a full-on dance routine and perform it for us live tonight. [ cheers and applause ] here's footage of them practicing backstage a little while ago. there they are, getting their dance on. it looks pretty good. here they are now. give them a hand, you guys. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: how are you doing, pal? nice to meet you. >> nice to meet you. >> jimmy: what is everyone's name? what is your name and where are you from? >> i'm kayla summers and i'm from westerville, ohio. >> jimmy: welcome. >> i'm nicole thompson. i'm from california. >> jimmy: hey, welcome. [ scattered cheers ] >> thomas mccarty from ohio. >> orlando laguna, farmingdale! >> sutton miller from winston-salem, north carolina. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: all right. very, very good. all right, very good. now, you guys have never met before, correct? >> yeah. >> jimmy: all right, you had to form this group here right now. now, while you were backstage, what name did you come up with? >> the rocka-felons. >> jimmy: oh, i like that. the rocka-felons. yes. [ scattered applause ]

clearly a bunch of felons. yes, dancing felons, definitely. i see you've been accessorized backstage. all right, let's take a look at your group photo. look at this. there it is. [ light laughter ] the rocka-felons. that's the photo that will launch your dancing careers. very nice. time to meet your opponents. welcome, you guys. what are your names and where are you from? >> abby from miami. >> jimmy: hey, abby. >> mindy hong from new jersey. >> jimmy: hey, new jersey. >> i'm justin laguna right from here in new york. >> rob from philly. [ cheers ] >> rich stovitz from new york. >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. all right, good man, rich. now what is the name of your crew? >> special sauce. >> all: wha, wha! [ laughter ] >> jimmy: they couldn't even hear themselves and they're the one's who said it. special sauce, what, what!? ew? >> eww! >> jimmy: yes, thank you, buddy. [ light laughter ] all right, here we go. you guys look good. you look like you're a solid crew here. look at your photo of your group shot there. there you go, there's special

sauce. money signs in there. that's the way to do it, you guys. it all comes down to this right here. look at this. it's time for the dance battle. behold the dance floor. that's where the magic happens. [ audience oohs ] now, the roots are going to play a song, and each crew will perform the choreographed dance routine they made up less than an hour ago. this is it, you guys. and remember what we always say here at "late night" -- cover your hat, cover your hat. ♪ from words of brett dolan from the classic street dancing film "step up" -- "when someone hands you your dreams, you take it. you don't ask questions." are there any questions? [ cheers and applause ] very good. rocka-felons, take the stage. >> say what! >> jimmy: oh, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, performing together as a dance crew for the very first time, please give it up for rocka-felons! [ cheers and applause ]

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: fantastic, guys. come on back. that was good. come on back here. special sauce, they made a pretty bold statement there. oh, you found some sunglasses. [ laughter ] that's all right. looks good, man. now, look.

they were pretty awesome out there. you guys think you can top them? >> yeah. >> jimmy: oh, really? you feel good? >> yeah! >> special sauce. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: very good, special sauce, wha? >> wha, what!? >> jimmy: what, what, what? [ light laughter ] go take the stage. there you go. oh, my gosh. unbelievable. what? [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, i can't believe that i'm saying these words. dancing together, for the very first time, please welcome special sauce! wha-wha! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: woo! that's the way to -- that's the way, yes. hurricane sandy right there, yes. questlove, you know what i'm talking about, man, yeah. all right. now it is time to pick our winner. who's it going to be, audience? will it be rocka-felons? [ cheers ] or will it be special sauce? [ cheers and applause ] we have a winner, special sauce, everybody! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] congratulations. and because you guys are the best dance crew, you'll each be taking home a $300 gift certificate to j. crew. there you guys go. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] there you go. congratulations.

>> thank you. >> jimmy: that's great. congratulations. because nobody at "late night" goes home empty-handed, everyone in the runner-up crew's getting a $100 gift certificate to j. crew. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ thank you so much. here you go. thank you to our friends -- congratulations, guys. thank you to our friends at j. crew and congratulations to all of our dancers. stick around and we'll be right back with ethan hawke, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ we can't guarantee she'll always mind her table manners. we can't guarantee she'll be much help with the yard work. we can't guarantee she'll stay out of your personal space - not that you'd want her to... but we can guarantee that petsmart grooming... ...will make your dog look great! try us today. with the petsmart grooming look great guarantee, you're happy... or it's free. petsmart®. happiness in store.™ [ female announcer ] go-to...

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our first guest is a multiple academy award and tony nominee, who can currently be seen on the big screen in "sinister."

and also at the classic stage company in new york here, in the play "ivanov," which runs through december 9th. please welcome ethan hawke, everybody! ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you know how to do it. you've got to do it. >> thank you. thank you. >> jimmy: that's my man, ethan hawke in the house. thank you, buddy. i'm pronouncing it right "ivanov." >> there you go. you got it now. >> jimmy: "ivanov." ivanov." and this is a chekhov play? >> it is. it is a chekov play. >> jimmy: you do both. this is why i love ethan hawke. you do a lot. first of all, you're a great new yorker. >> thank you. >> jimmy: but also you do a lot of theater. and then, you do a lot of like, fun, awesome movies. and you do some indie movies. you're just like one of my favorite actors out there. >> well, thank you, man. you're a pretty great guy yourself. >> jimmy: i'm a big fan of you. oh, please -- thank you. [ cheers and applause ] >> i don't even know how to respond to that. we were talking backstage

because we have deron williams on the show tonight. >> oh, yeah. exciting for you. >> jimmy: that's exciting for me, but also you. are you going to be brooklyn nets fan, or are you going to be new york knicks? >> well, you're striking me at a very personal place right now. >> jimmy: that's true. i'm sorry to do this. >> the whole household is in -- >> both: -- turmoil. >> yeah. >> jimmy: jinx, buy me a coke! >> yeah -- that was exciting for us. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that was exciting for us. >> all right, here you go. >> but, the truth is, my son and i are both -- >> jimmy: that was exciting for us. i love that. [ laughter ] [ talking over each other ] yeah, yeah, yeah. >> but i've been a lifelong knicks fan. >> jimmy: me too. >> but, i was a little upset last year with the whole jeremy lin thing. i don't think they shouldn't have let him go. i thought he was the most authentic thing to happen in sports. >> jimmy: it was great, yeah. i totally agree with you. [ applause ] >> guy comes off the bench, he lights it up. he makes the fans get excited. and then like, "eh, who cares. send him to houston." >> jimmy: yeah. >> you know, i was not impressed. >> jimmy: because you have to invest your time in a player and a team. >> and then we got jay-z over there, who's bringing it to brooklyn. >> jimmy: jay-z's coming to the barclays center -- >> i mean, the stadium looks

great. we got deron williams. so my son and i are spending the whole season -- don't tell deron. well, i guess i just did. but i see him looking at this whole season as an audition. >> jimmy: it is, yeah. it is, to see which way you're going to go. >> it's an audition. my son has already gone to brooklyn. he wants the nets. >> jimmy: he does? >> yeah, i think so. we're going to watch. >> jimmy: yeah. because it's exciting, now. >> it is. >> jimmy: and i think they're playing the knicks first game, next thursday. so it's like, "we'll see what happens." >> but you've already made up your mind. >> jimmy: i've got the outfits. i got hats. i got jerseys. i've got -- i'm going to dress up. >> why aren't you -- i think you should spend all next week in only nets paraphernalia. [ laughter ] that's what you should do. the whole week. >> jimmy: you ought to see my arms. i can't do it. it's just pretty embarrassing. let's talk about your movie "sinister." now, you guys want to see a scary, freaky movie this halloween if you go see "sinister." congratulations on this. >> thank you. >> jimmy: it's been a giant hit. this is from the "paranormal" guys. "paranormal activity" guys. now, what made you do this one? >> well, my first movie was a movie called "the explorers." right? >> jimmy: yeah, oh, my god. come on -- [ cheers and applause ] one of my all-time time favorites. >> but the guy who directed -- i was 13 years old when i did it. the guy who directed it,

directed "the howling" and "gremlins," and he loved scary movies. yeah. his name's joe dante, and he's a brilliant guy. and he taught me about movies. and he taught me a lot about what genre movies are supposed to mean. and so, for years i've been waiting to do the right kind of horror movie. and this guy, scott derrickson, talks about horror movies the way people who make great horror moves talk about them. >> jimmy: you know, with love and passion. >> yeah, he loves these kinds of movies. and so, i had coffee with him once. i was like, "i want to make a movie with this guy." and he delivers. it's a really, really good -- >> jimmy: the trailer alone freaked me out. is there any way to set it up? do you want to set it up for anyone, or tell us what it is about? >> i play a writer who -- all right, it's a kind of funny setup. you learn this in the first two seconds of the movie, so i'm not giving anything away. he is a failure. he's seen better days. he was a big success back in the '90s. i can kind of relate to this part. you know, and then -- [ laughter ] he's looking -- you know -- he wants to get one more, you know, hit of the spotlight. you know? and he has this idea to write a book, and he wants to move into a house where there was a family homicide.

you know, like four children and the parents were all killed. and he thinks if he moves in there he'll get inside their heads and be able to write a great book about it. but he doesn't tell his wife and his family because, obviously, who would want to do such a thing? >> jimmy: yeah, no one would ever -- >> yeah, exactly. >> jimmy: -- in their right mind, would do it. >> but, he's so ambitious that he wants to do it. and that's the setup of the movie. >> jimmy: it's super, super spooky. super scary. here's a clip of ethan hawke in the movie "sinister." take a look. [ eerie music ] ♪ ♪ [ laughs ] >> jimmy: everyone in the audience was like -- [ cheers and applause ]

>> you've never acted in a horror movie, right? >> jimmy: no. >> the thing that's so hard about acting in a horror movie, is you have to do this ridiculous stuff. i mean, you know, it's really hard. you have to make an ass out of yourself. >> jimmy: really, because you have to overact? >> yeah, you have to. ah! you know what i mean. [ laughter ] you have to do all this kind of [ bleep ] or -- >> jimmy: that's what everyone just did. okay, it's all right. don't worry about it. [ laughter ] we'll bleep you out. it's all right. we've done it before. [ cheers and applause ] you guys, ethan hawke is the greatest. [ applause ] >> we've had everything. we've had a moment of sharing. we had cursing. >> jimmy: a moment of scandal. check him out in "sinister," in theaters now. and "ivanov" at the classic stage company through december 9th. james van der beek joins us next, you guys. come on back. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ [ dog 1 ] i am not a vegetarian!

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imillion dollars for maryland one hundred schools.ty...ard. question seven will double it. rushern baker: question seven will add table games and... a new casino, generating millions of dollars... every year, without raising taxes. leggett: and audits will ensure the money goes... where it's supposed to. more jobs, and millions for schools. baker: question seven will be good for our kids... our teachers, and our schools. leggett: keep maryland money in maryland. baker: please vote for question seven. leggett: vote for question seven. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our next guest this evening is one of the stars of the very funny new show, "don't trust the b in apartment 23." which airs tuesdays at 9:30 p.m. on abc. please welcome back to the show, a talented man. here's james van der beek. ♪ [ cheers and applause ]

[ dawson's creek theme ] ♪ >> jimmy: james van der beek! i love you. >> thank you. >> jimmy: welcome back to our program. we love having you on the show. >> thank you for having me, man. >> jimmy: it's always fun to see you and run into you. you're a good man. >> well, thank you. >> jimmy: now, everyone -- we all know you, of course. we know you as dawson. that's what we -- [ cheers and applause ] >> wow. >> jimmy: the first time we knew who you were, it was dawson. but i did a little research. that was not your first time on television. >> no, no. my first time -- i started auditioning when i was 15 years old. i lived in connecticut. and i thought, "i want to do this in new york." my mom, god bless her, took me to the city, i got an agent. and then, for a year and a half i auditioned for commercials and didn't book a thing. >> jimmy: no? >> like, literally, not a single thing. i would sit there in the waiting room, like, just, "got to have my pops, got to have my pops,

got to have my pops." [ laughter ] i mean -- oh, i would have loved -- >> jimmy: doing a corn pops commercial. >> i would have loved to have booked a corn pops commercial. and then -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "got to have my pops." >> and then, all those other kids -- and you know, they'd be there. they'd be like, "oh, yeah, man, i just booked hubba bubba." [ laughter ] "oh, yeah, i saw you on nerf. yeah, did you -- no, i booked that." i was just like, "man." and i was doing theater, like legit theater in new york, but all i wanted was a freaking bubble-yum commercial. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. [ laughter ] >> or corn pops. >> jimmy: "got to have my pops." >> and then, i got lucky. at one point, i auditioned for this thing and they wanted like a really strong dude, a really scrawny dude. i was in between. so i thought, "i have no shot at this." so i went in kind of whatever, and i got called back. and i thought, "all right, obviously, they just checked the wrong name on the sign-in sheet." so i went in, and i just like -- i thought they were going to literally say, "oh, i'm so sorry, you're not supposed to be here." and i went in and i got it. one thing that i just -- i

didn't care because i knew i wouldn't get it. the only commercial i ever booked. >> jimmy: what was it for? >> it was for a product called oxy-10. >> jimmy: oh, yeah. >> the little medicated pads that you would put on your face. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: we all used it, yeah. then you pull it off, you go, "ew!" >> it was like, some sort of acid that would burn your skin off. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. fantastic invention. every kid uses that. you got to watch those pads all over your face. >> oh, my god, yeah. i got to utter the immortal lines -- "get your zits off my arm." [ light laughter ] that was my line. >> jimmy: we have a clip of the commercial. [ cheers ] here's james van der beek. oxy-10. >> ah! >> get off. >> -- you are, pretty boy. >> aw -- >> any final requests? >> yeah, get your zits off my arm. i can't have any zits. the party's friday. >> don't stress! >> we'll oxy-cute them. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]

>> my poor brother -- my poor brother was -- god bless him, was a freshman in high school when that commercial started airing. >> jimmy: oh, no. >> like right in the middle of it. >> jimmy: does he look like you? >> he looks a lot like me. and he was, you know, like a freshman on the football team trying to fit in and just everybody was saying, "get your zits off my arm." >> jimmy: "get your zits off my arm." >> it was good training for like, when he was a freshman in college. "dawson's creek" was in its heyday. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: oh, my god! he must hate you! your brother like -- >> and he's trying -- he's playing college baseball and he's trying to pitch. you try pitching to an opposing team with the name van der beek on your back in 1988. >> jimmy: they kept calling him dawson and singing, "i don't want to wait!" >> literally, it was like that. the whole time. >> jimmy: well, i mean -- gosh. well, i mean, you've probably proven yourself. and now, you actually, weirdly play james van der beek in "the b in apartment 23." but it's a heightened version of yourself. >> it's a demented, bizarre-o world version. >> jimmy: how did you get this part? >> you know, i got this call. they said, "these people want to meet you."

the pedigree between them is like -- they created, you know -- like, "american dad." and they worked on "how i met your mother" and "modern family." and i was like, "this is like a comedy dream team." i'm like, "they just want to meet me?" they're like, "yeah." and i said, "wow. well, what's the catch?" and they said, "well, they want you to play yourself." [ light laughter ] and i was like, "what?" but it's kind of like even some "funny or die" skits. so, i went in. we laughed for 45 minutes. and i thought, "if i want to do comedy, these are the people i want to work with." and so, i said, "i'll do it on one condition that, don't ever be afraid of insulting me." like, "don't ever think that, 'oh, you know, we'd like to pitch that, but i don't know how he's going to say' -- just go for it." >> jimmy: you're a good sport. now, what's the name of the jeans that you -- apparently you have a line of jeans. >> oh, yeah, fake me releases a line of way-too-tight jeans called "beek jeans." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "beek jeans." it's really, really funny. i have a clip of you. here's james van der beek playing james van der beek. >> oh, this is from the halloween party. >> jimmy: yeah, it's the halloween party episode. this is "don't trust the b in apartment 23." it's funny.

>> hey, baby. who needs syrup when we have snow? [ bubbling ] [ magic noises ] >> wee, wee! burr! i love ice cream. >> this is the invite for your halloween party? >> james is terrified of halloween. >> yeah, i hate being scared. hate it. hate it worse than i hate applause for other people. >> so every year james throws a positivity party where we celebrate life and happiness. >> absolutely no scary costumes. just happy ones. it all started when i was a kid. my dad played me a vhs tape of "halloween" on christmas. he ruined two holidays at once. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: "ruined two holidays at once." you're always welcome here, buddy. thank you. come back whenever you want. james van der beek. [ cheers and applause ] brooklyn nets superstar, deron williams joins us next. there he is right now in the bud light platinum suite! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our next guest is a three-time nba all-star, two-time olympic gold medalist, and the starting point guard for the brooklyn nets. their season opener tips off against the new york knicks november 1st at the barclays center. please welcome deron williams! ♪

♪ brooklyn nets we're the brooklyn nets we're the brooklyn nets we're the brooklyn nets ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: so good to see you, buddy. you look good. are you excited about this? >> very excited, man. >> jimmy: i mean, it's like a whole new thing almost. >> i was just talking about it in the back. i mean it's a quick phenomenon. >> jimmy: look at you here. this is you on the cover of "sports illustrated," brooklyn rising, number eight right there. [ cheers and applause ] look at that. that's cool. that's a good cover. [ applause ] >> definitely. i think did a great job with it. that's one of those magazines -- as a kid, you grow up, being an athlete -- you dream about, you know, being on the cover of one of those. >> jimmy: yeah, you don't even think that -- but, gosh, you've done everything. i mean, the olympics, cover of "s.i." i mean, you're doing it all right now. >> trying to. >> jimmy: you're also doing the a lot of good stuff for charity. i have to say thank you for that. because i did tell you again on the night of too many stars raising money for autism.

[ cheers and applause ] to fight autism. [ applause ] and you did a very interesting thing. you auctioned off -- you said, "look, if you guys raise enough money, you'll get a fake tattoo." >> yeah. >> jimmy: now, where are you going to put the tattoo? >> i haven't decided yet. that's the problem. >> jimmy: you haven't decided yet. >> maybe we'll let the people decide that, too. >> jimmy: all right. you can go to cc.com/tattoo. and you're going to choose one of these tattoos and you'll put this on. >> the people are going to choose. >> jimmy: the people are going to choose. >> if i would have choose, i am choosing betty white. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: you would get a tattoo of betty white. >> you got to love betty white. who doesn't like betty white? >> jimmy: no, everyone loves betty white. i love betty white. i mean, i like that. or you can do -- which one is this one? this is the -- >> dramatic chipmunk. >> jimmy: this is dramatic chipmunk. [ laughter ] that's pretty funny, too, man, dramatic chipmunk. or yakov smirnoff. [ laughter ] >> i don't even know who he is. [ laughter ]

>> jimmy: [ russian accent ] you don't know, what a country! ah, he's great comedian. >> i've heard. i've heard it all, but i don't know him. >> jimmy: he's great. so, if you go to cc.com/tattoo, you can go. you donate whatever you want. you can do a dollar. you can do 50 cents. whatever you want to do. and you choose which one -- deron williams will wear one of these tattoos. we're not sure where yet. i'm assuming -- probably his leg or arm. >> somebody told me neck. i got to get a betty white tattoo on my neck. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: you get a betty white neck tattoo, that'd be pretty -- then you got to make it real. >> i don't know -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: your kids will love you if you do that. that will be rad. that will be rad. i want to talk about this guy, too. this is super fun. i love video games. i love new things. i love technology. i love new gadgets. here's your game right here, nba baller beats. now, check this out. if you have xbox kinect, xbox 360. what you do is -- it's like, you know dance dance revolution or dance central, any of those games where you have to do the dance to the right beat. you dribble the ball to the right beat. and it is unbelievable. it is so cool.

i love that they got you involved with this. >> i'm glad to be a part of it. you know, being a point guard and having to dribble -- you know, having certain dribbling skills. i think it's just a great partnership. you know, it's a great game. it's a game where, you know, kids have to get up and be active. you know, they're not just sitting down and playing a game. >> jimmy: video games where you can actually move around -- >> it's something that all ages can enjoy. all skill levels. if you know how to play basketball, if you don't know how to play basketball, you can pick this game up and play it. >> jimmy: it's just super, super fun. i just want to tell people because i know how much of a giving person you are. everybody in the audience is getting one of these tonight. [ cheers and applause ] that's what i'm talking about. it's not under your seat. don't look under your seat. you'll get them on the way out, you guys. this thursday -- first game -- i'm going to be there. i'm going all season. i'm brooklyn nets all the way. you're playing the new york knicks. how big is this win? how important is this game thursday night? >> it's a big game, you know. it's a big game for both teams.

just to kick off the season, kick off kind of a rebirth of a franchise. and brooklyn's behind us. so we're really excited about the game. can't wait for it to get here. >> jimmy: it airs this thursday night. it's on tnt. november 1st. oh, my gosh. we love you. deron williams, you rock, buddy! >> thanks for having me. >> jimmy: you are the best. santa claus, deron williams right there. watch deron and the brooklyn nets take on the new york knicks november 1st, 7:00 p.m., tnt. the xx perform after the break. stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: coming up next this week -- russell brand, sarah silverman, carly rae jepsen, javier bardem, and christina aguilera. ike leggett: gaming generated one hundred and eighty... million dollars for maryland schools. question seven will double it.

rushern baker: question seven will add table games and... a new casino, generating millions of dollars... every year, without raising taxes. leggett: and audits will ensure the money goes... where it's supposed to. more jobs, and millions for schools. baker: question seven will be good for our kids... our teachers, and our schools. leggett: keep maryland money in maryland. baker: please vote for question seven. leggett: vote for question seven.

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♪ [ cheers and applause ] jimmy: our next guests are here to play us a song from their critically acclaimed second album "coexist." please welcome back to the show, the xx. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ we used to be closer than this we used to be ♪ closer than this we used to get closer than this is this something you miss ♪ ♪ i watched you breathe in and i wished you'd stop only for long enough long enough ♪ ♪ it's hard

to say ♪ ♪ separate or combine i ask you one last time did i hold you too tight did i not let enough light in ♪ ♪ ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh ♪ ♪ if a feeling appears if your mind should sway it's not a secret you should keep ♪ ♪ no i won't let you slip away

we used to be closer than this we used to be ♪ ♪ closer than this we used to get closer than this ♪ ♪ is it something you miss we used to be closer than this ♪ ♪ we used to be closer than this we used to get closer than this ♪ ♪ is it something you miss ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ winged or chained i ask you would you have stayed ♪ ♪ did i hold you too tight